Thursday, July 29, 2010

"Should" vs. "Could"

If you have spent the $5 to download Louise Hay's, "You Can Heal Your Life" Audiobook, you may have been struck by her "Should" vs. "Could" teaching. It's waaaay too early in the morning, so I'm not going to re-state her teaching accurately, but it goes like this:
She believes that the word "Should" needs to be removed from the language. Whenever you say "Should" you are in effect saying "wrong"... "you're wrong." Making yourself wrong is not empowering. It keeps you stuck, trapped, in a vicious circle. When you make yourself wrong, you attract more and more instances of you being wrong. You never get out. You stay stuck and repeat your patterns over and over, because you are bad... you are wrong. (Does this sound like your Weight Loss Journey?) She believes the word "Could" needs to replace "Should." "Could" gives you Choice. "Could" gives you Power. Instead of saying "I should... do this or that," say: "If I really wanted to, I could... do this or that." So anyway, she has her clients make a "Should List": a list of all the things you "Should be doing" or "Should have done." She then has them read each one aloud, but instead of saying "Should" they must begin each item with "If I really wanted to, I could..." This puts a whole new energy on it. And after each of these statements they read aloud, she gently asks them, "Why haven't you?" The answer is ALWAYS the same... it may take a while to get to it... but the answer is always the same: "Because I don't deserve it"... "Because I'm not worthy"... "Because I'm not good enough"... that is always what lies at the core of every problem, people. I am typing this at 5:00am because I just went through a slew of "Half-the-year-is-over-and-I-SHOULD-have-lost-weight" emails (yes, I'm 2 months behind in emails! LOL) Anyway, people, your language HAS POWER. Words HAVE POWER. Sound is literally a wave of POWER. "Should" cripples you. It removes your power. Replace it with "Could"... if I really wanted to exercise today, I could... if I really wanted to get this weight off, I could... if I really wanted to become a 10, I could. So everyone: Make your "Should List"... Replace it with "Could"... Then gently ask yourself, "Why haven't you?"